Burnout!

But those who trust in the Lord will find new strength. They will soar high on wings like eagles. They will run and not grow weary. They will walk and not faint.          (Isaiah 40:31 NLT)

I am ashamed of how long it has been since I have written in this blog! It seems to me that I have been experiencing a case of burnout. This has happened to me many times in the past, and in many venues. Most prominent are the periodic cases of burnout that I experienced in my Law Enforcement career. In my extensive experience with burnout, I have learned that eventually it will pass. Sometimes it leaves a scar; sometimes it is difficult to bring yourself to a point of restoration. But nonetheless, burnout does pass and you move on.

One of the side effects of burn out is the tension created within when a part of you wants to accomplish many things, while another part of you cannot get motivated to start. Many of my friends are aware of how I often lament that time is passing away from me. It has been seven years since I started work on the book that became Going Forth in the Name. The first six years was taken up with the actual writing, and the last year (or so) has been an unplanned sabbatical from writing. At that rate, I will be ninety-nine when I finish my sixth book. I sometimes feel like my old friend Wally Brahms, who used to say:

“I am going to have to live to be one hundred to accomplish everything I want to do, but I’m running so far behind now that I think I’ll have to ask for an extension.”

I have recently begun, once again (for about the fourth or fifth time) to read John Eldredge’s excellent book, Walking With God (see my posting “and so I bought the book" 29 April, 2009). I am surprised at how this book is speaking to me in new ways that I was not yet ready for in my first few trips through.

John Eldredge tells a story, starting on page 25 about how God sometimes forces us to rest. I won’t retell the story. You can read it for yourself. It is a story about pushing oneself, as I often find myself doing. It is a story about being driven, as I often find myself to be. It is a story about how God often has to “pin us down” by using such circumstances as rain (or burnout) to put us in a position where we have to listen to Him!

Now that I have resolved to listen to Him, I feel better; more hopeful, but it is not getting any easier. The enemy launches a full frontal attack whenever I try to write anything. It has been about a month since I first started to write this.

I have found comfort however, in these promising words that He spoke to Jeremiah:

If you return to me, I will restore you so you can continue to serve me. If you speak good words rather than worthless ones, you will be my spokesman. You must influence them; do not let them influence you!           (Jeremiah 15:19 NLT)

It is time to move on. It is time to write once again. It is time to, among other things, bring this blog back to life. This is my prayer, even as I ask all of you, my reader friends, to pray for me.

Lord, show me how to return to you.

Let me stand out of Your way as You restore me.

Give me the words, so that I may say good words rather than worthless ones.

Let me influence the world around me.

Do not let that world influence me.

I ask this in Your name, Jesus

Amen

As always, thanks for sharing this moment with me today.